NBNCo and the fuckening

After enduring two and half months are hell and serious concern about my ability to work I feel I need to document my experience for the benefit for others.

Long story sort, I became a professional Internet developer in 1997. Over ten years ago I moved to Scoresby and started a family. iiNet shoved some ADSL2 gear into the Scoresby TX and I got some seriously sweet Internet. I got evicted and moved to Bayswater and stayed with iiNet despite them not having their own equipment, and I did it again when I returned to my true home of Ferntree Gully. Moving to Ferntree Gully has been a problem because DTV has serious problems (MPEG2 over air) and I don't get any television. Eventually the household gets tired of this and moves to Telstra/Foxtel so the televisions in the house can do something. I use the Internet for way more than Facebook and YouTube so I have custom DHCP servers and firewalls so I'm in the "office of the future". All is well until the 29th of January 2019 when I'm forced onto the NBN. This is where the story begins.

I was at work at the time but an NBNCo tech came into the house and replaced a modem with two modems. Everyone is wondering if NBNCo are going to deliver FTTC or FTTN but I'm getting neither, just some bull shit modem replacement. However I'm at work so I just see my house vanish from the Internet and for it to never return. This immediately affects my productivity so I start freaking out. Over the next two months I try to donate a static IP to Telstra and then order a second connection to address the issue. I have no explanation why NBNCo have broken everything. The second connection is just as useless so after a while I remove all the new gear and return it to Telstra as broken.

After trying to live like this for over two months I turn to Facebook to ask for help and I got it. I find out quite simply the NBNCo are deploying CGNAT without telling anyone. To be fair, NBNCo have to deploy CGNAT because version four of the Internet died years ago but on the other hand Telstra didn't have this problem. They just decided to throw that onto me without any explanation.

The lesson here is that when you are forced onto the NBNCo's concept of the Internet, they actually remove you from the Internet. I've determined this can be resolved by either abandoning version four of the Internet or creating a Virtual Public Network into some other country not at war with itself.

Thursday 18th April 2019 1:25 pm

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